Fancy Stress

Time: 8.20am; Setting: the vicarage hallway. 

The plot so far: we are stressfully hunting down matching shoes for the walk to school after a sticky, delaying incident with the cat litter tray.

Small Son: [as we head for front door] 'By the way, I've got to bring a firefighter's outfit to school today.'
Me: 'Now you tell me!' [Thinks quickly] 'Go and grab your navy trousers and  Bob the Builder helmet.'
Small Son: 'I don't think they wore helmets in 1666.'
Me: 'You've got to be a 17th-century fireman?'
Small Son: [patiently] 'Yes Mum!'
Me: 'What did they wear?'
Small Son: 'Dunno.'
Me: 'Probably tights and tunic. Quick, ask your sister...'
Small Son: 'I'm NOT wearing tights!'
Me: 'Did they even have firemen in 1666?'
Small Son: [disapproving] 'No Mum! They had firefighters.'
Me: 'You have precisely 60 seconds to turn yourself into a 17th-century firefighter.'

Luckily Small Son decides that the fearless firefighters of Restoration England wore jeans and a red Primark fleece. I am not going to argue and we hurtle out of the door almost on time. 

A week passes.

Time: 8.20; Setting: the vicarage hallway

Small Son [as we head for the front door]: 'Mum, it's the Harry Potter day today. I said I'd go as Dumbledore...'

Find more Funee posts at Actually Mummy and more stressy ones at Herecomethegirls


  1. can I suggest that said mum reads newsletters and can be a little more prepared???????

  2. The fireman costume wasn't in the newsletter. They're training the children in word-of-mouth communication. The Harry Potter day I was aware of, but Small Son, being in denial, hadn't sorted a costume. Luckily, like all mums, I keep a Santa beard and a pair of safety pins for emergencies.

  3. Always at the door it happens - so frustrating! *shakes fist at kids* (That's my kids not yours. That would be wrong.)

  4. You safety pin a santa beard onto a seven year old !!!! What are you thinking of?

  5. Well, I did try sewing it on, but I'm rubbish with a needle!!

  6. I can manage a ghost or an angel and that's at a push! Mainly so long as it can be made with a white sheet and some safety pins it's all good!

    ooo TOGA!

  7. Ha ha ha ha .... Dumbledore - all you need is glue and cotton wool for a long beard and a sack tunic over the top with dad's dressing gown!

  8. They're training the children in word of mouth communication?! You what?! That's just crazy. Some children are never going to remember. It's just unfair for them and the parents.

    Anyway thanks for linking up. Was lovely to have you round. I was slightly intimidated entertaining a vicars wife so hope you liked the p's and q's I was minding and the best china.

  9. Hi first time here and I had to giggle... my daughter did the same to me a few days ago as they where about to celebrate Thanksgiving, she told me that morning that red,white and blue had to be worn, easy i think untill she says and you have to be a turkey..... at which point I just gave up.


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