Tuesday, 23 April 2013

Mod Cons

I'm not a great believer in labour-saving devices. I evicted my husband's microwave when I moved into the vicarage. I rely on the remaining intact pages of my road map rather than entrust myself to a satnav. I've never owned a tumble-dryer and I would be clueless about loading a dishwasher. There are, in my view, few domestic challenges that can't be overcome by a dustpan and brush and a pair of Marigolds.

I am, however, thrilled with my dual-function washing machine: whenever it drains a cycle, it washes the kitchen floor. Muddy paw prints and cemented cornflakes no longer crust my vinyl. Desiccated peas have been washed out from under the fridge and the mysterious scabs round the cooker feet have been dissolved by Fairy non-biological.

Admittedly there are drawbacks. Lately the machine's thoroughness has turned the kitchen into a boating lake. Yesterday's copy of The Guardian is no longer adequate defence. I've had to restrict my laundering to Mondays when the Vicar has finished with his Church Times and the Sunday supplements are to hand.

But the plus points far outweigh the inconveniences. No longer does the spin dry carve creases into the family cottons. And garments outgrown by the children stretch to fit as they sag soaked on the airer.

A replacement appliance arrives next week. The Vicar, weary of wellies at breakfast, insisted. But I am grieved. I'm still wary of mod cons, but I've had a fortnight freed from unloved chores and it was a heady feeling. Now I've got to remind myself where I keep my floor mop.

What's your favourite mod con?

Many thanks to all of you who helped me onto the shortlist for the Brilliance in Blogging Awards. If you'd like to vote your favourite bloggers into the finals, do what it says here

24 comments:

  1. My dear friend, you need a dishwasher! Please... it will transform your life.

    I like the idea of a boating lake in the kitchen. Much better than a rowing machine in the spare bedroom!

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    1. Today I had a waterfall too when the half that hadn't leaked onto the floor poured forth when I opened the door. Dishwashers do nothing for me.

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    2. "Dishwashers do nothing for me." Wrong! Dishwashers wash your dishes for you.

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  2. Congrats on your nomination!

    Regarding mod cons, I couldn't survive without the washing machine and the dishwasher. GET A DISHWASHER. Really loading it is no more complicated that stacking plates on the drainer.

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    1. You do not convince me. How would I occupy my evenings if I didn't have washing up?

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  3. Genius. I couldn't live without my heated airer - yes, really - you plug it in, it dries the washing overnight or in a few hours for 3p per hour. No more hanging it all around the house, or on the line, then all around the house. It has changed my life. Good luck with your new one and many deserved congrats on being shortlisted. I hope we get to say hello / have a proper natter, this year. I am one of the butterflies, so no excuses! :)

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    1. Heated? Wow! Surely that's cheating. If I come, I'll definitely seek you out.

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  4. I had a dishwasher once. By the time you've rinsed all the crusty bits off you might as well wash up yourself. And because it's not worth putting a small load on, I was forever finding that my favourite knife/mug/spoon had been sitting unwashed in a smelly dishwasher all night with all the stains dried on. So I'm with you on dishwashers.

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  5. Congratulations on your nomination!
    I'm a bit of a gadget gal, and love my washing machine, dishwasher and tumble dryer in equal measure.
    But I do get a bit of thrill from hanging out laundry and folding it all up. Guess I was Mrs Tiggywinkle in a former life?
    (anon rach)

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    1. I wouldn't say I get a thrill out of folding it. Must be doing it wrong!

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  6. A dual purpose washer would do just the trick; I hate mopping the kitchen floor mainly because it's so dirty all the time with 4 working dogs and a filthy farmer trudging through!!

    I'd like a robot. One that will do all the housework, cooking, cleaning, washing and shopping.

    CJ x

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    1. I would lend it to you to assist with your floor, but it's now given up the ghost entirely with half a load of washing swilling inside.

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  7. I have a dishwasher, his name is Andy and he is very efficient. He also mops floors. I am a lucky lady! :)

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  8. I have to say that I love and loathe our dishwasher in equal measure - there is little more foul than that fetid water that sits in a little pool at the bottom of the machine, that I am sure whooshes around my glasses and mugs, and the idea of it heated is even worse! That said, when it was brand spanking new, there's nothing like opening the dishwasher and giving yourself a steam facial at the same time!

    Congratulations on being shortlisted! We are in the same category, much luck to us all x

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    1. Oh, congrats to you too. I won't ask you to vote for me! Like the idea of a steam facial, but you haven't persuaded me to invest.

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  9. I love my dishwasher and find if I want to spend a day baking I don't worry so much about the washing up! Although I bake a lot I've never succumbed to a food mixer/processor, I love my wooden spoon!

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    1. There's something very earthing about wooden spoons. I wish I lived in a house with someone who wanted to spend the day baking!

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  10. I might have to deliberately break my washing machine, just so I can get some sparkle back in my kitchen floor. I never have the time or inclination to wash it, so the scabby bits that you describe so eloquently are firm features in my house!

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    1. Yes, and if one does get a mop out it slides over the scabs. Your planned solution of moving house is the best!

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  11. Congratulations on your nominations - thoroughly deserved :o). Mmmmm I could not live without my dishwasher - absolutely not! We purchased it while I was pregnant - one of the best things ever. Also my dust pan and brush! :o).

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    1. Thank you, my dear. We did have a dishwasher briefly when we moved. I used it once. It sprayed brown grit all over our crockery then dried them on.

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  12. Ok I'm sure this has been mentioned already but - OMG YOU DON'T HAVE A DISHWASHER??? My face has locked itself into a look of shocked confusion. I may need to lie down.

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