'What,' I asked my 9-year-old, 'Would your three wishes be?'
Solemnly she sorted her priorities and concluded: to meet Emma Watson, to become an Olympian and for us all to be happy.
I asked my 8-year-old niece. She required no reflection. 'A bow and arrow, a sword and shield and a laser gun,' she replied.
I admire childish precision. But now Babberblog has turned the tables on me. He wants to know what I want. I assume he means that whatever it is he'll try to get it for me. The trouble is, my mind's now gone a total blank. Naturally, I crave world peace, health and wealth for all, a rebirth of the rain forests and a cure for dandruff, but I'd better keep my wants within the realms of reason so that Babberblog has a chance of procuring them for me by Christmas. So, Mr B, these, in random order are my desires:
I want hair like Wonder Woman. All around me, insane beauties are forcing the curl from their tresses and bleaching out their chestnut hues, and here am I limp, straight, yellow and grieving. Please, Babberblog, can I be dark and kinky?
I want to speak Welsh. I have a longing to be able to make cutting remarks in a melliflous tongue that none of my fellow train passengers are likely to understand.
I want to be able to sit through the Sunday service with a mind unimpeded by the Boden catalogue/choc ices/plans for my funeral/ the server's new hair-do.
I want a canal in my garden. I'm growing out of my ponds. I need a waterway on which I can balance a boat with bunk beds and a gas ring.
I want to be able to do what the Lady from the Choir can do with a wet wipe. Shining like a mirror my kitchen bin was after the vicarage garden party! It was a pleasure to tip my cooking into it. But my efforts on the stainless steel lid resemble the aftermath of a mollusc orgy.
I want to be able to finish Alister McGrath's Introduction to Theology. I began it 13 years ago so I could make informed pillow talk with the Vicar, but have stalled at page 242. I never seem to get past Dialogical Personalism.
I want the coat on p41 of the Boden catalogue.
Babberblog, if you can't get all of these I'll settle for 1,4 and 7, please.
And now I have to tag other bloggers to reveal their wants. You are in the hotseat: